This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize