Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
no you cant smoke seaweed
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
