Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
