i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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