He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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