you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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