I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
