I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
