found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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