did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
