The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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