we have officially lost it.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
