I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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