...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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