Even water is tasting like jack daniels
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I enjoy the company of your penis
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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