Well douche your snatch and let's go!
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Randomize
