so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize