AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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