Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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