If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
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He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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