Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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