sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
