put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
