yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
