Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
