I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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