first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
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