He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
i've created a new STD.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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