what day is it and did you see me today?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
