i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize