Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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