Sry I called you an 8
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
