the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
