just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
We're too hungover to prance.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize