Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize