do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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