He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
