She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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