she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Randomize
