omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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