youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize