Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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