dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
your room smells of hookers.
And success
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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