Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize