Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize