you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
The dick lei will go down in squad history
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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