You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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