In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize