JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
