I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Two words: blizzard sex
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
